One of my frequent questions from a couple is simple and upfront: "How long is a wedding ceremony?"
Yes, the length of a ceremony is important. If it's too short, it feels "weird." And if it's too long, it can make a couple feel vulnerable and uncomfortable.
For me, length is about "how a ceremony" feels - not only to the couple but to family and friends. If a ceremony is well-written and well crafted, it will go by very quickly. You know that feeling you get when you're seeing a really good movie and you can't believe it's over? That kind of feeling.
And to answer this question: ceremony length depends on the specific couple as every situation is unique. And most often for me, a wedding ceremony ranges from 18-28 minutes in length.
Tonight, I got an unexpected email from a favorite couple of mine: they are cancelling their July wedding ceremony and celebration. And my heart is with this couple as they both make their way through this week of "cancelling this" and "cancelling that."
And here is what I hold as true: nobody knows what truly goes on within a loving relationship except the two people involved. To cancel is to step up and take a courageous stand - it's a powerful choice that, while exceedingly difficult and heart-breaking, is a visible and invisible act of courage.
If you are planning to have your wedding ceremony on a beach or very near the water, I invite you to take a few pointers from Jason and Anna's wedding ceremony...
- Not to short, not too long. Many waterside weddings have the grand fortune of good weather and like Jason and Anna, a very hot day. Work with your Officiant to insure the ceremony is just the right length so people are not baking in the sun!
- Pre-ceremony refreshments. Yes, your guests will hugely appreciate some lemonade or punch before the ceremony, particularly on a very hot day.
- Standing position. Work with your Officiant on how/where you will stand as a couple during your ceremony. This allowed Jason and Anna's photographer, Barbie Hull, to get some great photos and as usual, I moved around so the focus was truly on this couple.
- Use the beach/waterfront for a grand group photo. A waterside group photo is a marvelous "thank you" to include in your post-wedding note to guests.
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In this work that I do, every couple I work with has a different vision for their wedding day.
So, indulge me while I take a minute or so so share a few of my hard-learned tips to creating a more elegant wedding ceremony:
1) Give Your Guests A Job ~ Before your ceremony begins or before pronouncement, have your Officiant/Minister tell your family and friends what is "going to happen next." This way, guests know what to do immediately after a ceremony and this creates a more elegant transition from ceremony to party/reception.
2) My Half-Hour Suggestion ~ If your wedding ceremony is starting at 6:00 p.m., put 5:30 p.m. on the invites. This "fudge time" allows for a little extra time for a bride/groom and wedding party and also creates a more easy and elegant welcoming for family and friends.
3) Put your Intention On Creating An Imperfect Wedding Day ~ Perfect Wedding days are "perfect' because they are imperfect. This is the paradox of a wedding day. Focus on the key ingredients of a beautiful wedding day: love, appreciation, gratitude, anticipation and peace. I love and treasure the imperfect moments of a wedding ceremony as they are spontaneous, often fun and joyful and handled with ease and care, they creates lifetime moments.
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WOW! So many views! Thank you SO much everyone! I've gotten so many awesome comments and messages about this video, including some great questions about Sign Language and Deaf culture. I'm overjoyed to see that it's touched so many lives and blessed so many hearts. I will most definitely be filming a how-to guide for this song, plus more videos in ASL soon once I'm finished with finals. Thanks again for your kind words! God bless!! -Jen
PS: Follow me! http://twitter.com/UTJenHawk09
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Me doing "Give Me Your Eyes" by Brandon Heath in American Sign Language. There are some pictures thrown in too. Some are a tiny bit graphic and sad to go along with my interpretation of the song, but they get happier I promise.
I spent a lot of time on this video, so please let me know what you think! This is pretty hard to sign, haha...a lot of signs and it's super fast! =)
God bless!
-Jen
Here are the lyrics:
Looked down from a broken sky
Traced out by the city lights
My world from a mile high
Best seat in the house tonight
Touched down on the cold black top
Hold on for the sudden stop
Breathe in the familiar shock
Of confusion and chaos
All those people going somewhere,
Why have I never cared?
Chorus:
Give me Your eyes for just one second
Give me Your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me Your love for humanity
Give me Your arms for the broken hearted
Ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me Your eyes so I can see
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
Step out on a busy street
See a girl and our eyes meet
Does her best to smile at me
To hide what's underneath
There's a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie
Too ashamed to tell his wife
He's out of work
He's buying time
All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared?
Chorus
I've been there a million times
A couple of million eyes
Just moving past me by
I swear I never thought that I was wrong
Well I want a second glance
So give me a second chance
To see the way You see the people all along
Chorus (x2)
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